My business

"Mind your own business". How many times have I heard that phrase or thought that phrase silently to myself. It is trite and has a somewhat bossy connotation, like "don't tell me what to do". Yet minding our own business is exactly what each of us is meant to do.

I can't mind anyone else's business. First of all, I don't know it. I might think I do, but I don't. Second of all, I can't even if I try. It would be a strain and impossible to mind someone else's business. Sometimes, we are asked to mind someone else's business and, in my experience, this is where trouble strikes and stereotypes pervade. The bossy mother-in-law, the controlling boss, the nosy neighbour. Not a good thing, though good fodder for television sitcoms.

I do mind my own business. There are parts of life that are mine. I decide when to write in my blog, when to go skiing, when to do my contract work, when to go skiing. I even decide when to call my daughters and friends. All those things are but a sampling of my business. Others may disapprove of how I conduct my life, my business, but when I mind my own business, I am true to myself.

There are parts of my life over which I have no control. As much as I might want these things to be my business, they are not. I recently received numerous e-mails, one of which angered me. I chose to let it sit without a response and within a day, the situation had resolved itself. The aspect that had angered me was none of my business and by not attaching to it, I stayed calm and focused on my business. A key learning here is that others' reactions to us are not our business. Those reactions belong only to the other.

"Things will take care of themselves". I haven't subscribed to this notion. I have believed in doing, taking action, but I am learning slowly that things do take care of themselves, especially if those things are not my business. A lot of those old pithy aphorisms (Mind your own business, Things will take care of themselves, Let it be) may be trite but they are true. I still do believe in action but only at the right time, in the right way and with respect to my business. What I am learning slowly is what is my business is a lot less than I thought. (Which is good, because it leaves me more time to ski, play, and enjoy life.)